Posted on Tuesday, 19 August 2003, at 4:45 a.m.

From Elizabeth Bennet's perspective:

I have made many mistakes in my life, and I am heartily ashamed of most of them. The one that was probably the greatest error of all has luckily been solved. That happened only a few days ago. I think of everything that happened before that very often; I should have been more sensible.

It all started when he came to Meryton. Mr Fitzwilliam Darcy of Pemberley in Derbyshire. Now a name to love, but then it was considered a name to hate.

He came, he saw...and he behaved like a madman. Slighting everybody outside his own party, dear William was considered an arrogant snob, not worth anyone's attention.

I believed all that. I met him at the Meryton Assembly, and there I soon set an opinion: He was arrogant, haughty, and not worthy of my time.

If only I had known how wrong I was.

A few days later, things changed drastically. A new report was spread about Meryton: Miss Darcy, Mr Darcy's sister had come to Netherfield.

Now that was interesting. Mr Darcy's own sister had come to Meryton, and I could not wait to meet her. Back then I thought that the only reason I wanted to meet her was to see if her demeanor was similar to her brother's. Now I know that that was not the case. I wanted to learn more about the Darcys, even though I did not want to admit that to myself.

On one of my morning walks, my wish was granted. I had been walking for a good half an hour, when I happened upon a young girl.

I didn't know who she was. Her clothing was fashionable, and here and there her blonde hair peaked out from under her bonnet. I guessed she was about Kitty's age, or maybe Lydia's. She looked at me with big, round scared eyes. Did she think me a bandit, ready to rob her?

"Good morning," I curtsied while smiling at her. I tried to show I was not an evil person but a normal girl who enjoyed taking a walk as well.

The girl looked frightened and threw a look over her shoulder, as if she was looking for a route to escape.

Since she did not answer I knew this would need more drastic measures. The poor girl was obviously very shy and frightened by strangers. Perhaps I should make her comfortable by telling her my name and where I lived.

"I am Elizabeth Bennet," I stated, still smiling friendly. "I live nearby, at Longbourn. Are you visiting someone here?"

The girl met my eye curiously. "You are Miss Bennet?" she blurted out.

"Yes." I lifted my eyebrow. "What is your name?"

"I..." the girls cheeks turned red. "My name is Georgiana Darcy," she whispered.

I remember being surprised by this. I had expected the girl to be some relation visiting her family. I had not expected this shy girl to be Mr Darcy's sister! I was surprised, indeed. "It is nice to meet you Miss Darcy. I have heard so much about you." I stated, smiling.

"You are too kind," She mumbled with her eyes focussed on the ground before me.

"I trust your journey went well?" I inquired. It was a deadly boring thing to ask, I know, but I had to say something!

"I... yes, it did." Miss Darcy still did not lift her gaze from the ground.

"May I accompany you on your walk?"

"Of course!" she blurted out and her eyes lifted to mine for a second.

I smiled and moved beside her.

And that is how it began. I made Georgiana's acquaintance, and soon broke through her shield of shyness. She turned out to be very sweet and charming, and we became friends.

Of course, Georgiana soon noticed that I was not fond of her brother at all. It certainly attracts attention if someone tells whole stories about how great her brother is and you only answer with an: 'Oh. Lovely.'

So one day, Georgie scraped all her courage together and blurted out the question I had not expected: "What do you have against William, Lizzy?"

I was surprised, astonished, and maybe a little proud of Georgiana for asking such a blunt question. "Uhm... well, I... I do not really... uhm... I do not have anything against... uhm... your brother." God, forgive me this lie.

"I know something is the matter." Georgiana insisted.

I sighed. What could I have said to her? Sorry, but a man named George Wickham told me your brother is an arrogant, snobby man (which I knew because he slighted me), and doesn't respect his own father's will and I totally agree with him that your brother should return to his grand Pemberley as soon as possible so the population of Meryton can draw a breath again?

Hmmm... that was probably not a great idea.

So, what to tell Georgiana? Could I tell her that Mr Darcy slighted me? Yes, I thought I could have told her that... but was that enough reason to hate someone like I do? She probably wouldn't accept that...could I tell her what Mr Wickham told me? Or was that not such a great idea... after all, she knew Mr Wickham and his father... but maybe she never knew what a terrible thing her brother did? Or worse, she did know?

Uh oh... my thoughts were going the wrong way. Of course Georgie did not know, with her sweetness she would never approve of it.

I sighed again and carefully started. "Well... you know... when I first saw your brother..." I stopped. I am talking to his own sister for Heaven's sake! How could I ever tell her this?

"Yes? Tell me Elizabeth, I will not be angry or anything...I want to know!"

"Well... he... slighted me."

"William? He slighted you? What happened?"

"He said... I will cite his exact words: 'She is tolerable I suppose, but not handsome enough to tempt me'. That is what he said."

You can imagine Georgie's reaction. Her eyes went wide and she repeatedly asked me if I had not heard it wrong. But I had not, so Georgiana was left to be ashamed of her brother's poor manners.

"So this is the only reason why you... dislike him?" She asked.

Oh my... I just can't lie to her! I just can't! "No... this is not really all of it."

So I just went ahead and told her about Wickham. If I had wanted to get the same reaction that I had from telling her this, I could have killed her brother, too. Georgie cried at the mention of Wickham's name and cursed him for deceiving me. When she had regained her composure, the Ramsgate story and the exact story about her father's will were related to me with a tear-stained face, and I was left to die out of shame. I was ashamed, I really was. What was I thinking, believing a man who told me his life story after a two minutes of acquaintance? I apologised to Georgie again and again, but I never spoke to the brother about it. I do not think Georgiana told him either, for his behaviour towards me never changed.

A few days after Georgiana opened my eyes, she invited me to Netherfield. Thankfully, Georgie did not blame me for believing Wickham and welcomed me with open arms. She informed me that the ladies and gentleman of the house were out, but that her brother was somewhere in the house, probably in his room.

We chatted a bit about unimportant things while sipping our tea until she suggested that we go to the library. She had been reading a great book that she wanted to discuss with me, but she had forgotten the title.

So we entered the library, happily chatting, until my eye fell on a form in one of the chairs. I poked Georgiana in the ribs and pointed to the chair. She smiled. "It's my brother," she whispered.

All right... Just breathe. Just breathe.

Georgie approached the chair and greeted her brother. There was no reaction. When I approached, too, I saw that Mr Darcy had his book lying in his lap, and that he was fast asleep.

Georgiana smiled tenderly, "He looks very sweet when he's asleep".

Sure. Whatever, I thought.

But when I studied the man half sitting, half lying in the chair, looking so vulnerable, something seemed to change inside me.

Like a spark it hit me: Georgiana was right He did look sweet when asleep. It was a sudden realisation that made me shudder. He had been handsome when awake, and now sweet when asleep. What else could he be? Charming, friendly, merry?

The process of loving Fitzwilliam had started. This was just the beginning.

And that's how it all went. Georgiana opened my eyes and made me see what a wonderful person her brother really was.

Once I realised I loved William, it did not take long for me to make him realise the same. He proposed, I accepted, my father accepted and my mother more than accepted.

I was taken away from Longbourn by my handsome prince, off to his castle called Pemberley.

FINIS